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48 – 73 = 25

Here’s the thing. If I take when my father passed on , and I take my age , I don’t have much time left to do anything. I’ve wasted allot of time. When I was 30 I said that when I am 40 I wanted to be in front of audiences. I’ve only spoken at funerals. Never had an opportunity to relay anything . To the point that I feel that I used to have a ton to say , and now ? , I feel like I have nothing to say. I’ve been oppressed and lied to. I have a vision. Perhaps I should start small. But I need opportunity. I feel like circumstances aren’t working with me. In the meantime, I see great strides from the younger folk. They are embracing social media like pro’s and I am sitting here with any and all responsibility. 25 years is all I got . I need to embrace it and make it work for me , not I for it. 

I’ve learned allot about multisites and blogging since I’ve started. I haven’t quite figured out advertising yet. There are a few legal loopholes I need to jump through before that ever takes effect. Oh Oh Oh ! Wait.. let me tell you what I’ve found. It’s PDFdrive.com. Where you can download text books for free. So I put in PR books. And I found a ton of text books to download. I wanted to see what I missed out on when I didn’t follow the direction I was told to follow when I did my aptitude tests in high school . Net result ? I have downloaded 9 text books. I worked out that if I have to read 4 pages a day it’ll take me 2 years to read all of them. So that’s what I am going to do. A kind of self imposed degree. I just want to see what I missed out on. Luckily for me , I don’t need to write any exams to get a qualification because the degree I have is already an overkill for PR.

I have also been reading bible. I bought a cheap bible to mark text in . I think it’s better to have a cheap bible. I can’t bring myself to write in an expensive bible.

I feel like I am writing an exam , called life. And I am failing because time is almost up. I remember in School I could never finish an exam in the allotted time.

 

The Knack

I have a knack. A knack of helping people in tight situations change their public image. And what have I been doing with my knack ? I’ve been handing it out for free. But no more will I do this service for free. People just ride you and when they’re happy they forget about you. My natural gift is PR. What am I doing with my gift ? I am burying it in the ground. I was told to study a BA communications in art degree. I thought ” I am not the artist in the family ” . Why would they tell me to go study art ? Obviously they saw something that I missed. It’s never too late to try and make a go of it. I have been told that I have a smart mouth. I can sell ice to eskimos.

So , starting this year , I aim to do some art lessons. Buy a new lens for my camera , and try to find my voice again. I know I’ve said allot on this blog about my life and what I should have and could have done. I also know that in Christ I get to be what my hearts desire is. But you have to take some steps toward it. Starting with art could lead to being on stage sharing the gospel. I am just tired of being weighed down by people not seeing me for who I am. I’ve realized I have no friends in this world. They don’t see me. If they did I’d not feel like I have to prove myself around them all the time. They’d just accept me. Bunch of idiots. They always get into the ‘ where does your money come from ? ‘ routine.

About 6 years ago I got a word from the pastor of my church. He said ” Nick , it’s time to stop looking in the rear view mirror of your life and start looking in the windscreen ” . I was very angry when he said it but it’s true. I joined that church because it connected me to the people in my high school. None of whom I’ve gained any benefit out of . In fact I’ve been downright disappointed by them. They value I placed on them was misplaced. Perhaps I was looking back after all. And even this whole ” I should have been a doctor thing ” is looking back. ” Or I should have studied PR ” … who cares. Point is.. I must just be happy and the little space God has carved out for me will materialize. And people will tell me what I should be. I’ve an idea it’s PR … Sharing the gospel is PR for God but God didn’t build us to have zero secular success. He also built us to succeed in the world.

Weather it’s giving advice to world leaders or just doing the odd painting , I have to find some certainty in my life.

Anyway , Happy New Year everyone.

I’ll try to post a few more interesting videos in the network this year. Spread it out.

 

I died 20 years ago

20 years ago I finally realised what it means to receive Jesus as my Lord and savior. I died and He came to live in me. But this is not hockus pokus.. Its the truth of His finished work that I embraced. I refused to go back to work because I realised that I have a new I indentity I don’t have to work for. So I was born again. I was so radical that my family, friends and doctors thought I had lost my mind. I was suffering from depression yes and a broken thyoid yes but there was a seed of hope planted at the same time. This new hope in His finished work kept me moving forward and anyone who dared stand in between me and Him has been crushed.. My exam is over. I don’t have to prove myself to Him or anyone anymore. I represent heaven on earth. Everytime I meet a new girlfriend she starts trying to fix me. Big mistake. I am dead. Immune to fixings. I am alive to God. Many people have failed to see who lives in me and have died\n or suffered terrible fates. I just realised again today ‘my exam is over’ and I have been found fit to serve and deliver His seed to a dying world. Repent for the Kingdom of heaven is at hand.. If you acknowledge me you acknowledge Him and if you acknowlege Him you acknowledge Him who sent Him. Basically if you acknowledge me you acknowledge God because I come in His name. If I then touch you, you should be healed.

Lifes ups and downs

In life we should learn early on who we are. Take the time out to find out what our talents are. We don’t usually want to accept who God made us to be. Why? Because we care too much what people think of us. I was told to study PR. Never did. But if I think about it all I’ve ever done really well is create good impressions. Help people out of their messes by creating a good impression for them. Whether it’s by helping them with a school assignment or helping them out of a bind because of what they’ve done. The work of an advocate in some sense. But we have an advocate with the father. Jesus Christ the righteous. So to come to think of it I was Christ like defending and promoting people, processes and situations.

I am in a cue at the Centurion municipality and I’ve got nothing else to do. So I thought I would write something on my blog. Perhaps one day I’ll call it a Vlog. Would be nice, if certain people would stop interfering with how I do things..

I have noticed that when I tell people about my news network that they want to join. I don’t have the mental capacity to add and track a deciple at the moment. But wouldn’t it be great to have people on board who would look for testimonies and use their cameras for good. Why must it always be about money. People should want to blog without compensation.

Still waiting to be served.

Preliminary Report on CANSA evening


We had an evening to raise funds for Cancer victims in the moot. I was there on hand and asked if I could take some photos for the cause. I ran about for 3 hours , without a flash because my batteries were flat. I wasn’t prepared. But here are some of the photos I managed to salvage using only my 24 mm lens.

This guy is really funny

None the less. He makes a compelling argument. I think it depends on what you’re going to use the camera for. If it’s to capture news , I don’t think you need a full frame sensor. If you want to do portraits with bokeh then buy a full frame body otherwise don’t worry about it. I think it’s a pitty that the camera companies don’t make lenses for cropped sensor bodies. They want people to buy the bulky camera’s for portrait work which cost more.

Breakthrough !

You know .. the older you get ..the less time you have for frustration. I have been banging my head against the wall trying to figure out why my website doesn’t render properly on cell phones.  I have been clearing the cache for months now . Cache is something that stores some information of your website on someone’s device so that it will load faster next time they come to see it. I kept clearing the cache and then it would work a few times and then out of the blue it would go back to mobile theme. I was losing my marbles ! 

I just couldn’t figure it out. I struggled for months. Today I tried to add a friend of mine to the menu and the menu wouldn’t work . I had just had enough and so I removed the WT3Cache , a plugin of sorts , and installed WP SUPERCACHE plugin instead and vuala ! It works perfectly now ! I can change the menus of each site and I can see each site fully rendered without it looking all compact for cell phones and missing half the pictures. I feel like this is a milestone. Everything just runs smoother and it all looks so professional. I am happy again with my little old project website. It’s going to be a great place for photography , art and testimonies. All upbeat.. it’s coming together slowly and I am pleased.

Recent photos

What manipulating a photo can create. A friend of mine braaing at his house on his day off .

I guess the years are showing

Steady as she goes

My year old watch.

Becoming more active in photography

Becoming more active in photography. Recently I have been so frustrated. What else is news , so I used my saved photos on my hard drive to help distract me. I joined Gurushots a while ago and recently I joined National Geographic. I just uploaded photos for fun and tried to see how I fare in some contests.

I am surprised at how far I got with so little time invested in photography. Most of my equipment is make do and specials I saw for a bargain. I also recently got a scanner working again by embedding windows XP into my windows 7 operating system using virtualbox. So now I have a 19200 dpi scanner for negatives working again. I also managed to embed my flickr account into this blog. Anyway .. this is how I have fared so far in gurushots. I have managed to reach the rank of veteran.

I also entered some photos in national geographic to see if they’re worth anything and guess what ? ! I’ve received some favorites there by some guys. Just a dreamer is all I am . But it’s good to dream as long as you take some action along the way eh ?

I am still messing about with my scanner … but here’s what I managed to get out of a negative using bad lighting on the scanner and a program called rawtherapee.